Remembering Johnny Cade
by Kyepie05
Summary: Two-Bit knew things wouldn't be the same without Johnny. Nothing broke his heart more than seeing him dying and afraid. Nothing except being at his funeral and not hearing anyone saying a word about how special Johnnycake was. So he steps up...


**I'm really excited to get this up! It didn't really go the way I thought it would though! But personally I like the way it ended up. So I really hope you guys enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it.**

** I don't own anything! S.E. Hinton owns The Outsiders!**

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He had never been angrier. Never. He glowered at the small woman in front of him. The woman who had eyes as black as her heart. Those eyes reminded him painfully of someone else's. But no… _His_ eyes were emotional, happy, sad, scared, shining, loving, excited, joyful, laughing, dancing... Her eyes were cold and dark, emotionless.

"But I have a right to see him!" she was ranting. "He's my son. After all the trouble his father and I have gone through to raise him, this is our reward!" Two-Bit Matthews felt his hands forming into fists as he jammed them quickly into his pockets. Raise him? Is that what they did? Is that what that witch thought she did? _Never hit a woman… _"He'd rather see those no-count hoodlums than his own folks…" That was when she saw them. He gave her an angry, bitter sneer. She just kept looking at them with such hatred that Two-Bit almost thought she hated him as much as he hated her. Almost. "It was your fault. Always running around in the middle of the night getting jailed and heaven knows what else…"

He narrowed his eyes, his sneer vanishing. Their fault? _Their_ fault? They'd saved him a thousand times. If not for them who knew what little Johnny Cade would have done? He would have run off at least. He may have got hard. He may have killed himself. "No wonder he hates your guts," he spat. He had quite a few swear words lined up that even Dally would have been proud of but Ponyboy pulled him away. He almost ripped himself out of the younger boy's grasp and went back but he stopped himself. Pony was right. This wouldn't help.

"Oh, lordy!" he said as they moved away. He felt tears welling up and prayed that they wouldn't start falling. He couldn't even remember the last time he cried. "He has to live with that."

_If_ little Johnnycake recovered that was what he'd go home to? _No,_ Two-Bit decided. _I'll kidnap him. I'll take him. He can come live with me. Mom won't care. He'll live with me and he'll be okay. And he can be happy and know that he's loved. He'll have a decent home. For once he won't be blamed for everything. He can come home with me…_

The elevator dinged and opened and Two-Bit was startled out of his thoughts. He glanced at Pony then followed him into the elevator. The moment Pony wasn't looking he wiped his eyes to make sure no tears were escaping.

* * *

Johnny's funeral was before Dally's by a few days. To be honest, Two-Bit wasn't looking forward to it a bit. He didn't want to be spoken to about death. He didn't want to truly have to deal with the fact that he was never going to see Johnnycake again.

He sat down in the church beside Ponyboy and glanced around the church, his eyes settling on the back pew. His thoughts flashed back to the last time he had been here. He had come with Pony, Johnny, Soda, and Steve. He, Soda, and Steve had horsed around and a hymn book ended up slamming against the ground. He had waved when the congregation had turned to look at them. Pony and Johnny were so embarrassed they had never gone back.

He gave Ponyboy a sharp elbow in the ribs. Pony looked up and Two-Bit could see that the kid already looked like he was going to cry. Golly, he thought with surprise, the service hasn't even started yet. "I'm sorry, Pony," he whispered softly. "I'm sorry we messed around so much that you and Johnnycake felt unwelcome around here. It was important to you guys... We should have respected that…"

Pony looked surprised but before he could answer him the pastor cleared his throat. Two-Bit and Ponyboy both turned to the front without another word or moment of hesitation. The pastor talked for a while. He read some things from his bible and, for once, Two-Bit listened. It helped, a little bit anyway. Before he had expected, the pastor stopped. He said something about people close to Johnny speaking if they felt like it, sharing stories and stuff like that. They'd done something similar at Mr. and Mrs. Curtis' funeral. The thought hadn't occurred to him that Johnny's service would go the same way.

Expectantly, he looked at Johnny's parents, who were just sitting there silently. They weren't crying, they didn't even look upset. To his surprise, he didn't feel as much anger as he did another emotion. Pity. He pitied them. He pitied the fact that they didn't know what a wonderful son they'd had. He pitied that they didn't know him like they did.

No one was moving to speak. That wasn't right.

"I'm sure the family has something to say?" the pastor asked, looking unsure. There was still silence.

"Yeah. I do." Before he even knew what he was doing, Two-Bit was on his feet. "I, uh… I ain't ever been one for public speaking," he said after a minute. "But I can manage it for Johnny."

Everyone was staring at him. He took a deep breath. "I've known Johnny Cade for a long time. A long time. He was a good friend. I woulda done anything for him. I'd've taken his place if I could've." He swallowed thickly. "You know, Johnny was a hell of a buddy…" He paused and cleared his throat. "Sorry," he mumbled after a moment. Then he continued, "I remember when I met 'im. It was lunch detention. I was in there for making a joke the teach- it was Ms. Brown that gave me detention that day- didn't quite approve of. Story of my life really. I know all my teachers better than they'd like." There were a few scattered chuckled in the crowd. "Johnny was there retaking a test." He smiled to himself at the memory. "I kept mouthing off to our teacher while we were there. Talking constantly and making all kinds of jokes. Well good ole' Johnny was keeping his head down and trying not to laugh, which got him on my good side right away. She got sick of me after a while I guess and took quite a long bathroom break. In that time, I started talking to Johnny. At first he wasn't too sure he wanted to talk, kept glancing back at the door in case Ms. Brown came back. After a few minutes though, I got him to laugh. He could hardly breath from laughin' so hard. Then when he got his breath I got him to tell me his name." A lump formed in his throat and he felt tears threatening him again. He took a steadying breath.

"It didn't take me long to work out that he didn't have friends. So I took him to meet the gang after school. Gee, he and Pony hit it off just fine." He glanced down at Ponyboy to see the younger boy's head on Soda's shoulder, tears falling down his face. Soda had his eyes closed, but Two-Bit could see a few tears leaking out anyway. He swallowed and looked around at everyone, not paying any attention to who might be there. "Johnny was real special. He was the nicest son of a gun I ever met and I ain't never gonna meet a soul like him again." His voice broke as he said, "I miss you, Johnnycake." He sat down, unable to stop himself from crying. He wiped his eyes hurriedly and cast his eye downward. The silence filled the church again, making him feel furious. It was like no one even cared. He tried to get things going but it didn't matter.

He forced himself to look up when he felt a firm hand on his shoulder. Soda was on his feet, eyes still bright with tears but none falling now. "That's a hard act to follow," he said, flashing his signature grin. A few people gave teary chuckles. Two-Bit looked around, curious. He wasn't surprised to see that Johnny's parents still weren't crying. But then he finally took a minute to see who was.

Mrs. Winters, their English teacher, was crying into her hands in a pew near the back. Mr. Halloway, the Science teacher, was a few rows ahead of them. There were others too, like Mr. Koch, Mrs. Bayless, and Ms. Marks. He could also see Sylvia there and saw Reggie, the man who owned the diner on Washington street. Sitting next to Reggie was Hallie, a girl from school who Two-Bit had never even heard speak before. There were a lot of kids from school, he realized as he looked around and several from the neighborhood as well. His eyes fell on the Shepard gang and Tim nodded to him once before turned his gaze back on Soda. Finally, Two-Bit saw Ms. Brown. She had her hand over her eyes as tears rolled down her cheeks, a small, sad smile on her face.

Dumbstruck, Two-Bit looked up at Sodapop. "Well," Soda said after a moment, "I guess I'll tell you a memory I have of Johnny. A bunch of us were walkin' home from school and I ended up walking with Johnnycake. Golly, was he upset! He was on the verge of tears and wouldn't look at me. Turns out he got held back. Once I got him talking it just all came out. He thought it meant he was dumb. Johnny wasn't dumb. It just took him a while to get stuff."

"And he liked to explore stuff when he did get it," Pony whispered.

Soda nodded, throwing his little brother a smile. "Yeah. That's right. I tried to tell him all that. But I got that he wasn't about to believe me. I mean who am I to talk about brains? So I took him to the person I knew could make anyone feel better about grades. That was my mom. Anyway, she talked to him and she started working with him on school everyday. He passed with flyin' colors that next year." He smiled sadly, a tear sliding down his face. "Boy, he was a smart guy, Johnny was. I know not many people saw it but I sure did. I knew all along. Johnny was brilliant. Maybe that's why he struggled." He was quiet for a few minutes, dark eyes cast towards the floor, tears beginning to run down his cheeks. "I ain't never gonna have a buddy like Johnny again. He was one of a kind. He really was. He'd do anythin' for ya. No questions asked. Not a one." His voice broke and his shoulders shook with light sobs for a minute before he calmed himself down enough to say, "I'll always miss him." He sat down beside his brothers and put his face in his hands.

The weight of the pain and the loss was still heavy on Two-Bit's heart but at the same time, he felt an enormous amount of love in the service now.

"Johnny sure was somethin' special." Darry was standing. "He was loyal and the nicest guy you'd ever meet." He was quiet for a moment then let out a chuckle. "You know, he was on my team when we played football. The bunch of us-" he motioned to the rest of the gang "-generally played on Saturdays. Soda, Steve, and Dally were on one team. Johnny, Pony, Two-Bit, and I were on the other. I will never forget this one game…. We played this game about three months ago. Steve, Soda, and Dally were winning. I like to think it was because I had just pulled a muscle the day before at work." That got a few chuckles.

"It's because we're better than you lot," Two-Bit heard Steve mutter.

Darry cast him a quick grin before continuing, "I was sure we were gonna lose. Then I heard Johnny yell "Pony grab him!" I managed to look over in time to see Ponyboy and Johnny both jumping on Soda at the same time then, once he was down and unpleasantly surprised, they did the same thing to Steve. They continued to team up on Soda, Steve, and Dal through that game and you know what? We won. Ponyboy told me later that it was Johnny's idea. Originally they were going to stop at Sodapop but they thought he looked so funny being so stunned like that that they went at Steve too and just didn't stop."

Two-Bit laughed softly, along with others. Johnny sure did get things. He knew how the score was and he knew how to win.

"Johnny was… Johnny was different. And that was what made him so special." There was a crack in Darry's strong voice that made Two-Bit look up again. "I ain't ever gonna stop being grateful for his friendship." He sat back down.

There wasn't even a second before the next speaker stood. It was Steve, standing there, still holding onto Evie's hand as she remained sitting. "I remember that game. Gee, I was sure stunned when they took me down." He turned to Ponyboy with a smile. "That was the funniest loss I ever suffered."

"He was the quietest kid," Steve murmured, barely loud enough for everyone to hear. "But he had one of the biggest personalities I've ever seen. And I run around with this bunch here." Chuckles broke out again. "Yeah, Mrs. Bayless, you know what I'm talkin' about. That poor women has taught each one of us," he explained to the rest of the crowd. "Look, I ain't one for all that many words. But like Two-Bit said, I can manage for Johnny. Johnny was somethin' special. "Y'know, I got jumped this one time. I was outnumbered. There had to be about seven of 'em or so." He looked might uncomfortable sharing this and Two-Bit saw him glance down at Evie for support, which he must have gotten from a squeeze in the hand, because he continued, "Glory, I expected to get my ass kicked good." He swallowed and glanced at the pastor then muttered an apology. "But then the kid came along." He gave a chuckle again. "Y'know, I say kid, but he wasn't all that much younger than me. Not quite a year." He shook his head. "Anyway, between us, we had them speeding back down the road in no time. When I went to thank 'im, Johnny just shook his head with a grin and said "you'd've done the same for me". And… He was right." There was a catch in Steve's voice and he turned his eyes down and repeated softly, "You'd have done the same for me…" His voice shook when he continued, "That was all he needed. He'd have done anything for any of us just because we'd do it for him too. We loved him and he knew it. We still do. And for that he was more loyal than… More loyal than the best dog you can imagine having." He sat down with a thud, unable to talk anymore, and pulled Evie into his arms.

Two-Bit barely had time to blink before Pony got to his feet. He was still crying, Two-Bit noticed. "Johnny was my buddy," he said shakily. "Two-Bit here used to tease us because we're both real quiet by nature. But we got each other. We got each other without saying a word most of the time." His voice sounded raw and his voice was croaking but it was relatively steady. "When Johnny and I took off and hid in that church, we got along real well. You'd think seeing one person only for five days straight with no breaks would be hard but it wasn't." He was quiet for a few more minutes. "Golly, he was a pal. Sodapop said it. He would do anything just cause you asked. He didn't need to know why…The night we ran away… I ran to him in the lot and told him we were running. He didn't ask a single question. He got to his feet and ran with me until we had to stop to catch our breath. Then he asked. But not before…" Pony swallowed before continuing. "And y'know, we never gave him enough credit. When you think of Johnny Cade, brave isn't the first word that pops in your head." He paused again. "Maybe it should be."

Two-Bit looked up at Ponyboy, surprised. The wheels in his head began to turn as he realized it was true. What he and Johnny had done to save those kids took real guts. Sticking up for Steve the way he had taken guts too. But yet he just hadn't ever thought about it that way. Johnny was brave.

"You didn't see him," Pony went on, almost desperate for them to understand. "When we were in there saving those kids… He wasn't scared. He was _happy_." Two-Bit looked up, surprised. He'd never heard Pony talking about this before. He'd never thought to push him. "He had the time of his life. I think it was because he was making a difference and he knew it. He knew it... That was probably one of the best moments of his life. He never hesitated. His eyes were _glowing_, glowing brighter than I'd ever seen them." Two-Bit digested the information. "Johnny Cade was a hero. More so than he was ever given credit for. He was gallant. When we were reading _Gone with the Wind_, he was real impressed with the southern gentlemen who rode into death. But the way I see it they don't got nothing on Johnny." His voice broke and then the kid was crying again. "He loved Robert Frost's poem. _Nothing Gold Can Stay_. That one. Johnny was gold," he said simply before sitting.

Two-Bit took a deep breath, expecting that to be it. They'd all spoken. It would be over soon. But then, to his surprise, he heard a voice speak. "Johnny was a good kid. He was respectful and always cleaned up after himself." Two-Bit looked over to see Reggie standing. "I enjoyed talking to him when he came in…" The man looked unsure of himself. "I may not have known him like you lot there did," he said slowly, "but I sure wish I had after hearing you all speak." He sat down.

It still wasn't over.

Ms. Brown got to her feet. "I remember that day Two-Bit mentioned," she said softly. "I remember telling Johnny he could retake that test in there when I had Two-Bit scheduled for detention. I wasn't sure I'd make it through the period," she added, giving Two-Bit an affectionate smile. "Glory, can Matthews talk. And so I left for a few minutes. And it was just what I'd hoped." Her watery gaze stayed on him and that's when Two-Bit realized it. She had wanted him to talk to him. She had counted on it. That's why she took so long in the bathroom. "Thank you for taking that boy in. Your group was good for him. I could see the difference easily. It wasn't hard. I'm just glad that he had a family with you." She sat down again and Two-Bit knew that if he tried to speak he'd start crying. He'd never felt more grateful to a teacher in his life.

Evie was next. "When I first started dating Steve, I sure was nervous to meet his buddies," she said slowly. "I met Soda first but Steve and Soda have always been attached at the hip so that one didn't take long. But when he took me to the Curtis house to meet them all, I was scared. I met Johnny first on the way over. He sensed that I was uncomfortable and when we got to that house he made sure that I wasn't left alone. If I was ever alone it only took three or four seconds for Johnny to be beside me. We'd sit in silence when we were alone most of the time but that was fine. I already considered him a friend. Over the years I got to know him better and I felt real grateful for the chance." She sat back down, crying.

As Hallie, the quiet girl that Two-Bit wasn't even sure had a voice, stood and started talking about how Johnny had stood up for her when she had been bullied, he felt a wave of an emotion he couldn't really name wash over him. It was love, it was peace, it was happiness, it was gratefulness. He was happy he got to know Johnny like he had and he was overcome with emotions at the thought that so many people had been touched by Johnnycake and Johnny had never even known it. After she spoke, Sylvia shared a few words, several teachers spoke, and a few students spoke.

After a long while, the church was quiet again. But this time the quiet wasn't because no one knew what to say or no one wanted to speak. It was because no one could even muster words anymore.

When the service finished, Two-Bit was surprised by a pair of arms thrown around him tightly. It was Ponyboy. "Thanks for speaking," Pony whispered. "Thanks for starting that. I was so scared no one would…" He couldn't think of anything to say so he simply hugged him. "Thanks for bringing Johnny to us," he added quietly after a minute.

Two-Bit nodded slowly, closing his gray eyes. "You're welcome…" When Pony let him go, he glanced over his shoulder in time to see the church doors swing shut as someone left. "Hang on," he said, heading after them. He walked out of the church.

"Ms. Brown!" he hollered after her. The woman stopped and turned to him.

"Yes?"

"Thank you," he blurted. "I didn't know you planned… I didn't…. I never thought…" He felt like a babbling idiot so he stopped long enough to come up with words again. "Thank you," was all he could think of.

She gave him a soft, sad smile. "You're welcome… Thank you for loving him. Goodness knows that boy needed it. And he found it. You showed that when you stood for him in there and claimed him as family."

Two-Bit looked down. After a moment, he whispered, "He is my family."

"I know." She gave him a kind smile. "You hang in there." She turned and walked away. All he could do was stare after her.

He thought back to the day he had met Johnny, feeling the tears gather in his eyes again and a small smile tug at his lips.

"_Well, I'm Two-Bit." He watched, amused, as the other kid glanced at him through dark eyes before turning to the door then back to his paper. The kid screwed up his face as he looked at the test then began to write an answer. "Golly, you're focusing awful hard." _

"_Trying," the kid breathed._

_Two-Bit cocked an eyebrow and grinned. "Don't get mouthy. I'm just tryin' to make conversation while I can. Ms. Brown don't really approve of my mouth. I figure she'd ship me off to Mexico if she could." The kid cracked a reluctant smile. "With all that concentration you got you better get an A on that test there." The boy looked at the door quickly then began to focus again._

_"I don't see why you won't tell me your name. It ain't like it's signing a contract with the devil," he stated, still watching him. The boy glanced at the door again, looking nervous. Two-Bit wasn't sure why. Ms. Brown wouldn't hurt a fly. "Come on! I'm bored," he drawled, tipping his chair back impatiently. The boy's dark eyes darted to him for half of a second before turning to his test again. "Can I help?" Two-Bit offered. The kid shook his head. "Well, gee, that don't leave much for me to do."_

_For the next five minutes, Two-Bit crossed his arms and stared at the kid. He only blinked when he had to and never looked away. Finally, the kid snorted a chuckle then threw his pencil at him. Two-Bit toppled out his chair, calling out that he was in pain and needed a doctor so dramatically that a minute later, the kid was in stitches from laughing so hard._

_ "I get your name now?" Two-Bit grinned at him, watching the kid hold his sides. _

_When he caught his breath, the kid finally stuck out his hand. "Johnny Cade."_

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**Well, you guys, I really hope you enjoyed this. I've been wanting to write it for a while so I'm glad I finally sat down with it. I'd really appreciate feedback guys! Thanks! :)**


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